Konstepidemin galleri (mountain room), Gothenburg, 2023

I don’t know how to life.
Welcome to life where uncertainty is all we have and we feed on the delusion that we can do something about it.
You sound a bit low, I hope you are taking care of yourself?
I am not sure anymore. Hanging in there? You?
I really have no idea what I am doing.
A needed amount of understandability?
Oh no, it’s the eternal fountain of doom.
It is like a path where a door takes you to another door and another door and so on. It is a bit frustrating to be in this kind of in-between place not knowing what will happen next and when that will be – are we ok with the sort of banal ending, about all of us being merely visiting?
I keep having dreams where I go to openings and hug people.
I am so tired of not being able to plan anything.
I don’t know if the world still exists outside my apartment. I don’t know how to exist in the world outside my apartment. 
It’s not you, it’s the world these days.
I don’t know why are all these things that should be basic practicalities so difficult? Like different stages or modes of the rabbit. Like the nest my home has become, a burrow, a shelter made of sticks and the dreams I once had.
I don’t know where we are – it has been super confusing where we’re going, we don’t know –  it’s like talking with the mad hatter, diving deeper into the rabbit hole.
I think this is an uncanny horror beyond conceptualising? An apocalyptic utopia of sorts of eternal bureaucratic damnation – It is encouraging me to read books that I find boring.
I still don’t know what a methodology is.
I don’t know how to be the rabbit and how to live in this bizarre and confusing situation slash environment, and through that also explore the rabbit hole as a metaphor for this situation we lived in, the pandemic, the lockdown.
Interconnectivity is a result of the in-between condition of things.
I think a twisted time is part of the rabbit hole? the rabbit hole being a hole itself.
I hope there is a moment when things are explained and shared and suddenly everything makes sense.
I don’t know if we have started using pants again.
There is just one final thing to write, I think

Less Known Than the Unknown
LAPS, Theatre Academy, Helsinki

How to PhD? (Technically a DA)
Research Assemblage, Aalto University.

Non-knowledge. Not everyday.
A Howe to Life presentation.
Slow Academy

As part of Manifesti event

So called presentation “Who brings home the bacon?”

Residency at Stiwdio Maelor, 2018.

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